I was having one of those days. You know, the kind of day where you do something really stupid and then beat yourself up over it for several days after. Here I was thinking ‘what was wrong with me, why have I not learnt this yet?’ So there I was well into day four of whipping myself – you know how it works, you start dredging up past wrongs, one after another, months and then before you know it a few years’ worth, and to make matters worse you heap those on top of the current ‘wrong’ you did. Pretty soon you’ve got a dark cloud following you around. Not to mention that extra weight on your back and you’re walking around all hunched over and angry. Mad at yourself for being so stupid, mad for trusting, seeing yourself as a total screw up, over and over and over. Geez Louise.
The bad self-talk went on and on. It seemed my committee of critics was having a full blown party and I was the one being roasted!
So there I was lying awake at 2:00 a.m. wallowing in my self-pity about what a poor excuse for a person I was. What was interesting was that the stupid thing I did wasn’t even that big, it was just something I wished I could take back. I was half-awake/half asleep when I heard the voice.
“You are not here to be perfect. Part of your purpose on earth is to experience imperfection. At your core essence you are already perfect.”
“Experience is the key word,” the voice went on to say. “To experience life in all its forms, good, bad and ugly, the juicy, the delicious and the sour. You came here for that purpose – to experience and learn – and to know yourself in many different ways. So let go of your perceived wrongs, the stories of what others said was ‘wrong about you’. You are perfect just the way you are. Besides, life would be totally boring otherwise. Don’t you agree?”
As someone whose work inspire thousands a day, sometimes people forget that I am human and my life is not perfect. A friend recently made a comment after I was sharing a challenge I was dealing with that she was happy to know that I too had ‘issues’ as it made her feel she was not alone. Yes, not matter what people think we ALL have issues and challenges in life and some days we are the dog and feel strong and other days we get rained on like the hydrant. But the key here is to learn to let go of that drive to be perfect and fall in love with yourself right now.
My wise self always know just what to say. I am learning to let things go. To chalk certain events up to another opportunity to learn about myself. Sometimes I don’t like who I am, but I’m learning to recognize those shadow sides and to move on. I’m getting to know myself a little better each time.
Here are some SELF-LOVE ACTS I have learnt along the way:
- Decide to Love yourself
Self-love is nothing you get or earn, claim it! It is a State of Embrace. If we think we ‘have to’ do or be it’s conditional and it sets us up for that critic.
- Make a List of reasons why you Love yourself
Eg: I love myself therefore I get enough sleep
- Accept your needs & honour them
We all have needs we want met. Sometimes we might not be in touch with what those are so at the key here is to feel your feelings, instead of numbing them. Validate them and honour your needs
- Embrace your Humanness
Acknowledge you are human. Accept setbacks and move forward instead of being taken away with it. Always approve of YOU and avoid needless self-criticism. Take the lesson learnt and use it as a spring board instead of allowing it to become quicksand.
And last but not least something i find that helps me is the Ho’oponopono ritual: I’m sorry. Please forgive me. I love you. Thank you. I find that always helps as I love myself enough to hear those words.
To your beautiful, imperfect you,
Like This Post? Please Support with One-Click Shares and I welcome your thoughts below
If you are looking to make a change this year but not sure where to start or clear on what it looks like I have a few openings in my business for taking on new clients. If you are committed to making this year your year and ready to invest the time and resources in yourself there is no better time to start. Contact me & book your complimentary call.